"I think that I shall never see a billboard lovely as a tree. Perhaps, unless the billboards fall, I'll never see a tree at all."

"People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up."

"Nietsche is Pietsche.'"

"The Pig, if I am not mistaken, Supplies us sausage, ham, and Bacon. Let others say his heart is big, I think it stupid of the Pig."

"The turtle lives 'twixt plated decksWhich practically conceal its sex.I think it clever of the turtleIn such a fix to be so fertile."

"Certainly there are things in life that money can't buy, but it's very funny -Did you ever try buying them without money?"

"A bear, however hard he tries, grows tubby without exercise."

"People ask me if I've ever been called a Nazi. I answer that no one has ever had dreams of being tied down and sexually ravished by someone dressed as a liberal."

"A few heart-whole, sincere, and energetic men and women can do more in a year than a mob in a century."

"Power in defense of freedom is greater than power on behalf of tyranny and oppression."

"Cute is when a person's personality shines through their looks. Like in the way they walk, every time you see them you just want to run up and hug them."

"One loses all the time which he might employ to better purpose."